If you're feeling down about being single for Valentine's Day, these 15 terrible date stories are about to change that.
I've had my own fair share of bad dates, but mine can't even compare to what these Redditors have experienced. From awkward conversations over coffee to an encounter with a possible serial killer, these tales will make you glad that your Valentine's Day plans consist of hanging out with your cat and watching Netflix.
1. "First date with a man I had met through a coworker. Takes me to Longhorn Steakhouse and loudly asks if I do anal. So loudly that people turn to look."
(via Reddit / ilovepottery)
2. "Went out on a blind date with this girl for coffee. During that time, she let me know that she thought she had a learning disability, that she had fetal alcohol syndrome, that she desperately wanted somebody to take care of her, and that she owed about $25,000 for several credit cards and unpaid bills. I couldn't get out of there fast enough."
(via Reddit / cyrus_hunter)
3. "First date and she wanted to come despite having to babysit that day. She repeatedly grumbled 'Don't be in it just for sex' and made clear mention that the child was not hers, and that her child was the product of her father molesting her. She also had female pattern baldness."
(via Reddit / Troomaan)
4. "I was on a date with some chick and while talking with her in the car, she stopped responding...and started snoring. Yea, this one's over."
(via Reddit / 360walkaway)
5. "I once went on a date with a guy I met on Craigslist. He showed up and proceeded to make me into his free therapist. I had to hear all about how his wife was bipolar and had left him a month earlier to move to another province with their two children. I heard from him exactly once a few weeks later. It was an email asking for a blowjob. Of course I declined."
6. "Took her to a quiet bar and grill, ordered a beer, and listened to her lecture me about how I am using beer to hide / deal with my insecurities. I ordered a second and a third."
(via Reddit / denikar)
7. "I scored a date with a very good looking girl, but her body was the only thing interesting about her. She didn't have any hobbies, education, or personality and was completely stone faced. We were at an Italian restaurant and she ordered an apple (what). After an hour of forced conversation I drove her back home. She invited me up, but I went home instead. To this day I'm convinced I was either speaking to an alien or would have woken up in a bathtub with my kidney missing."
(via Reddit / Work13494)
8. "Early college first date: She wanted to go to the horse-racing track for the day. When we arrived, she took me to her family's box seats -- and they were all there, waiting for us (she knew they'd be there, but didn't tell me -- it felt like an ambush). It was a very long, tedious day of races and betting, followed later by a seemingly endless dinner at her parents' house where they talked exclusively about gambling, horse-racing, and high-stakes betting. I couldn't wait to go home and get away from all of them."
(via Reddit / Back2Bach)
9. "We had dinner, went to my place and watched movies. He left around 2 am. Half an hour later I get a call for me to come bail him out of jail because he didn't know his license was suspended. Awesome."
10. "First ever OK Cupid date. Guy shows up still talking on his phone, looks me up and down, motions for us to go into the bar/restaurant. It was a Lebanese place and he declares 'I don't really like African food.' At this point I'm just waiting for my roommate to meet me out later so I can tell her about this disaster. While I wait, he continues talking and I hear the words '9/11 musical'. He had written a 9/11 musical. It was a comedy. I also paid because he was a 'feminist'. Ahhh, Brooklyn."
(via Reddit / NotGreatBob)
11. "The guy called me a fat ass because I ate more than half of what I ordered. Meanwhile I was much smaller than him and am considered to be in good shape."
(via Reddit / jessa395)
12. "Wеnt оn а dаtе frоm Tіndеr аnd hаlfwаy thrоugh thе соffее dаtе shе рulls оut Hеrbаlіfе sаmрlеs аnd trіеs tо gеt mе tо buy thеm аnd іf I wаntеd tо I соuld аlsо stаrt sеllіng Hеrbаlіfе...I wеnt tо а sаlеs ріtсh аnd bоught thе соffее."
(via Reddit / Firebasic)
13. "He had an open cider drink and kept badgering me to taste it (personal experience said no) and didn't take no very well...Long story short he refused to leave and I had to call the cops. When he realized i was calling the cops he chucked the cider into the treeline behind our parking spots and took off running. The car he was driving was stolen and when they tested the contents of the cider bottle...rohypnol and morphine. In the trunk of the car was duck tape, a hammer, and a bracelet that had been stolen off of a woman that had been drugged and raped a year prior."
(via Reddit / sunshineyhaze)
14. "He took me to a Ferrari dealership to lecture me on how Italian cars are awful and how he'd never buy one."
(via Reddit / bblonde)
15. "I'm in my mid/late 20s. We had been introduced by a mutual friend, first date was dinner, okay. Second date, she says she'll pick me up and we'll go for dinner. Her car pulls up. Her 60-ish-year-old parents are in it as well. Surprise! She thought I'd like to meet them. There was no third date."
(via Reddit / oliver_babish)