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26 Times The Local Mall Bunny Ruined Easter For Your Children In A Hilarious Way

APRIL 2, 2015  —  By Tim Unkenholz  
Tim Unkenholz

Tim Unkenholz

Writer and stand up comedian in NY. Check out my monthly comedy show Roomie Raiders at the Creek and The Cave! @timunken

Sitting on Santa Claus's lap is a time-honored Christmas tradition that has been passed down through generations. Not to be outdone by his old rival, however, the Easter Bunny has also decided to set up shop at the mall to receive children in his furry lap.

The problem is, while Santa costumes are easy to come by, the kind of person that owns a full-body bunny costume probably doesn't keep it very clean, and possibly uses it for weird sex stuff and/or to murder people in.

Here are some pictures of creepy Easter Bunnies posing with kids whose parents clearly aren't worried about their well-being.

1. Don't be fooled by the bunny suit, this is the twisty mustache of a baby stealer.

2. My guess is that handkerchief smells like chloroform.

3. Someone check Hell, I think they might be missing their gate demon.

4. Your tears only add to the flavor, my dearies.

5. Sucks about the Easter Bunny's burning hot acid accident.

6. Eyes as black as his soul.

7. It's pretty chill how this bunny looks like a vampire skull.

8. Looks like someone's skin graft went completely wrong.

9. "But it's not even Easter, Uncle Bow Tie!"

10. I think this might be a real-life mutant.

11. There's definitely human limbs in that bag. No question.

12. That awkward moment when your dog's favorite chew toy comes to life.

13. This is clearly just a deep-space alien trying to take advantage of this planet's strange customs.

14. This costume is super realistic because bunnies totally have fangs. This is known.

15. "Mr. Bunny and I have fun! I just wish he'd put his face back on."

16. When you're dressed up as a scary monster rabbit, you simply CANNOT look into a mirror like a normal person would.

17. It's the Easter Witch! Don't eat her eggs!

18. Kids love this rabbit because they get to see a nightmare they didn't even remember they had.

19. "Soon..."

20. Ok, do we just not know what bunnies look like?

21. Yoink!

22. This is, like, barely even a face. Were we trying to make it look like a face? This is not a face.

23. What, are you surprised that the Easter Bunny roars like a jungle cat?

24. Dad uses any excuse to put a pair of Mom's pants on his head.

25. Pink sheets: $11.99. Paper plate: $1.29 per pack of 50. Ruining the park for little Janice: priceless.

26. Don't listen to his gypsy lies, Brandon. He literally has snakes for a tongue!

So, this Easter, take your kid to the local mall so that they can be reminded of what Easter is truly about—letting your kid sit in the lap of a weirdo dressed up as a fuzzy banshee.

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